I Hate The Way I Love You.

[toppolino]

Предупреждение: ангст

I hate you.

I hate you and your goofy smile. Those full, pouty lips. That perfect hair, that amazing body. I hated you from the moment you placed your hands on my hips at that Masquerade Ball; whispering sexily in my ear as you danced to the beat, swaying my hips in time with yours. I hated the way you pulled off my mask and told me I was too beautiful to hide behind a charade, even when I didn't know your name and you didn't know mine.

I hate your charming, chestnut eyes, the way they glittered with the light of a million stars. I hate the way I fell in love with you right when I laid my eyes on you.

I hate the way I love you more than I love life.

I hate the way I love your kisses, the way they seemed to pull me from reality and intoxicate me with their addictive touch.
I hate the way you would hold me in your arms until I fell asleep.
I hate the way you would call me at three in the morning just to sing to me and tell me you love me.

I hate the way I love you.
I hate the way you love me.
I hate the way I couldn't let you go.

And most of all,

I hate the way you didn't say goodbye.

I hate the way you saved my life.
I hate the way you died.
I hate the way that drunken bastard drew a gun on me.
I hate the way he had a weapon and you didn't.
I hate the way you tried to grab the gun from his hands.
I hate the way the gunshots echoed through my head like a thousand songs playing at once; all singing mournful promises and lies.
I hate the way the first bullet entered straight through your stomach.
I hate the way the second bullet pierced straight through your heart.

The heart that beat for me.
The heart that died for me.

I hate the way your eyes tried to speak to me when the light began to fade from them.
I hate the way they glittered with a thousand unfallen tears.
I hate the way your lips tried to twist into a reassuring smile, even though I knew it was impossible.
I hate the way the blood fell from your lips, your flesh growing colder as your heartbeat got slower.
I hate the way my tears fell on your face, mixing with your fallen blood.
I hate the way the paramedic shook his head and said it was too late.
I hate the way that drunken bastard shot himself in the head before I got the chance to kill him.
I hate the way you held my hand until the very last breath passed your lips.
I hate the way your hand slipped from mine as you fell into oblivion.

I hate the way you left me without saying goodbye.


I hate the way I'm saying things I hate about you when in fact, I love you so much I couldn't live without you.


I love you and your goofy smile. Those full, pouty lips. That perfect hair, that amazing body. I loved you from the moment you placed your hands on my hips at that Masquerade Ball; whispering sexily in my ear as you danced to the beat, swaying my hips in time with yours. I love the way you pulled off my mask and told me I was too beautiful to hide behind a charade, even when I didn't know your name and you didn't know mine.

I love your charming, chestnut eyes, the way they glitter with the light of a million stars. I love the way I fell in love with you right when I laid my eyes on you.

I love you more than I love life.

I loved you even as I was slicing slowly across my wrist, so deep I felt my flesh shred like tissue paper against the thin razor.
I loved you even while Jon and Spencer were pounding on my bedroom door, begging me to stop.
I loved you even when they managed to break the door open and grab me, snatching the scarlet-tainted razor from my crimson red fingers.
I loved you even while they were crying and holding me.

I loved the way I slipped from their grasp, my surroundings falling away into darkness as my blood tainted the hardwood floor.


I love the way you came back for me, through the darkness and despair.
I love the way you smiled at me through your tears, lifting me off the ground.


I love the way you took me to heaven in your arms.


I love the way you love me.
I love the way I love you.



I love the way death can never part us again.

©2006-2009 ~JustifiedFaith
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